Destined for Cold
by crazygirlne
Summary: Sara Lance and Leonard Snart are soulmates. They're meant for each other, and they make each other better. Just because it's their destiny, though, doesn't mean everything's easy.
1. Prologue

Originally published on AO3 (on 7/14/2016), where the rest of my Captain Canary fic lives. I'm considering copying those fics over to here, and I'm starting with this one. I'll post an update a week (two today since my author's note will be longer than the prologue). It's third person after this prologue.

Hope you enjoy!

* * *

Soulmates are never supposed to be separated. That's the deal. You find your other half, and that's it. You have a partner for life.

So why am I alone now?


	2. Destined to Find You

**Destined to Find You**

Leonard Snart had been born with a mark, just like everybody else, but his had remained black and white, not just for a few years, but until he was a teenager.

He and his soulmate had one hell of an age gap.

It didn't bother him too much, though. He wasn't exactly in a hurry to settle down, to be in the love-drunk haze he'd seen others experience. So of course, around the time he decided some sort of stability might be nice, some sort of anchor who wouldn't betray him, the tattoo went dark. All the color, the swirling whites and blues, drained from the tiny mark.

It was impossible. Soulmates never died before meeting. How would they become soulmates that way? It couldn't have been someone he'd met without realizing it, either; that first meeting was supposed to be pain mixed with pleasure, some crap about the person you _were_ dying to make way for the person you were supposed to be.

If all that weren't enough, there was that whole thing where soulmates even died together more often than not, some tragic Romeo and Juliet bullshit that never made much sense to Leonard.

So why was his mark saying his other half had already died before they'd even met?

He remained that way though, existing with an impossible tattoo. Existing a bit recklessly, maybe, even for him, fighting with metahumans both alongside and against that goody two-shoes Barry, but existing nonetheless.

He didn't tell anyone. Not on purpose, anyway. Lisa noticed and suggested he see a doctor or something, but what was that gonna do? It wasn't like they could resuscitate his unknown soulmate. Mick found out, too, one night when they were both completely wasted and Leonard let it slip. Mick grabbed Leonard's arm and shoved his jacket sleeve upward so he could see it for himself, and he frowned in confusion until Leonard finally pushed him away.

Mick didn't bring it up after that night, but Leonard caught his partner watching him sometimes. He ignored it and continued with his exciting life of crime.

He was Captain Cold. He didn't need a soulmate. He was just fine on his own.

He didn't need a father, either.

Still, when the color found its place once more in the little bird tattoo, he was relieved. Hopeful.

Maybe he wasn't as broken as he thought.

* * *

Sara Lance had been born with a mark, just like everybody else. As far as she knew, there was nothing unusual about her mark. It was already colored in when she was born, and her father liked to tell her that the swirls of blue and white went perfectly with her eyes.

When she was a young teen, she liked to speculate about the person the tattoo stood for. It was pointless, she knew; it was too easy to try to force a connection, to try to force the shape to have some significance just because the person you were with seemed perfect for you.

She liked to imagine she'd meet her other half in winter. What else could a snowflake mean?

But winters came and went, and Sara had yet to meet her soulmate. She knew she was still young, but she didn't care. And if she couldn't be with the _right_ person, she may as well be with the _wrong_ one, and so she found herself on the Queen's Gambit with Oliver Queen, found herself falling down one rabbit hole after another until she landed in the League of Assassins.

The League treated soulmates differently than the rest of the world. Soulmates weren't an ideal; they were a liability. Most who'd found their soulmates kept them a carefully hidden secret. For the ones who didn't hide their other halves, there was only worry and pain.

Nyssa was safe, in this aspect, as dangerous as she was in others. But Sara loved her, and there were times that she wished she could scrub the mark away and just be who she wanted.

But nothing lasts. Nothing she wanted to last, anyway, though some endings were good. Leaving the League was bittersweet, and Nyssa was a large part of all her mixed emotions. It was time, though, needed to be done while it was even a remote possibility.

And then Sara died.

And then Sara came back.

Laurel told her, once she was herself again, that her tattoo had gone black and white while she was dead. It was the first time in years that Sara had thought about her tattoo with anything resembling curiosity rather than frustration.

What had that looked like on her soulmate's arm? Had theirs changed, too? What had their life been like if so, spending a year thinking, what, that she'd died?

That wasn't possible.

It helped, somehow, knowing that despite all she'd been through, that perfect person was still out there, waiting for her, maybe thinking about her, too.

Maybe she wasn't as broken as she thought.

* * *

There is supposed to be no doubt about who your soulmate is, once you've met. Of course, when Leonard finally feels that surge, that undeniable indication he's met his destiny, he is just waking up, and he is in the company of a group of strangers.

Some of them he's met already and can immediately discard as possibilities for his soulmate. For instance—

"Stein? What the hell are you doing here?"

He soon finds himself trying to sort through what the hell this Rip guy is talking about while still reeling from the fact that he's finally meeting his other half.

And he doesn't even know who it is.

There is supposed to be no doubt about who your soulmate is, once you've met. And yet Sara finds herself shaking off whatever sleep Rip put her in, feeling the tail end of _that feeling_ , the feeling like maybe she's dying and maybe she's just being born, and she's around multiple people she doesn't know.

She can rule out some of them, obviously. Still, she feels herself asking the wrong questions as she tries to tackle two different versions of her future at once.

By the time they split up to make their decisions, she's still not sure who she's looking for.

Laurel adds that to her list of arguments for Sara joining the team, because of course she confides in her sister, but Laurel is behind her joining even before hearing about her soulmate.

Knowing his soulmate might be in the group certainly contributes to his decision to join the team.

There's something about Sara that makes him wonder pretty quickly whether it's her. The bird alias helps, but then again, there's Hawkgirl, too, though he thinks she's highly unlikely.

He starts a conversation with Sara at the first opportunity, and initially, it doesn't even register what she's said: she was dead for a year.

A year. The amount of time his mark had gone dark.

It has to be her, but he needs to be sure, so when she suggests they go to a bar, he jumps at the opportunity. Besides, he's bored, and he refuses to sit still and be a good little boy for Rip.

She changes for their outing, and her new outfit shows her wrist for the first time since he's met her.

She has a snowflake tattoo, and it's the same color as his bird tattoo.

His _canary_ tattoo.

He finds himself watching on, and then joining in, as his _soulmate_ kicks ass in a bar in the 70s.

* * *

Sara isn't sure who her soulmate is at first, but she thinks it's probably Mick or Leonard.

They're the only ones who have enough personality not to bore her to death, besides maybe Kendra, but Kendra has that whole thing going on with Carter.

Reincarnation, soulmates in every lifetime—that's more complicated than she even wants to think about, even before time travel gets mixed in.

She and Mick get along okay, but there's something about Leonard that makes her hope it's him. It's the bar fight that tips the scales from _hoping_ it might be Leonard to _thinking_ it might be Leonard. It's the way they click, working together like partners when they've only just met.

She catches him staring at her afterward, in the temporal zone, and she doesn't think it's just because she punches Rip after Kendra does.

He's not staring at Kendra.

He sneaks glances at Sara while Ray is working on his spiel about destiny, too, and what other reason does he have for the way he words his answer?

"For better or for worse."

If it isn't him, he should use phrasing less connected to two people spending their lives together.

She grabs his wrist as the group makes its way back to tell Rip their choice, instinctively grabbing the spot she knows has his mark. She plans to ask him a few roundabout questions, maybe, she isn't actually sure, but what she ends up saying when he turns around to face her is, "It's you, isn't it?"

"Is _what_ me?" he drawls, but his eyes are drawn to her snowflake, just inches away from his covered mark. He doesn't fight when she pulls up his sleeves. He watches her, though, as she sees his tattoo for the first time.

His _canary_ tattoo.

"It is. It's you."

His face remains impassive, but she sees a rush of emotions through his eyes: pain, hope, fear, relief.

She recognizes them because she feels the same.

She sees herself in her _soulmate_.


	3. Destined to Know You

**Destined to Know You**

Knowing she's his soulmate makes it easier to relax with her, or maybe it's some quirk of the soulmate bond itself at work. Things just feel right.

Knowing she's his soulmate also makes it harder to relax with her; things just feel right, and experience has taught him that when things feel right, his world is about to go to shit.

They're falling into a routine, despite the fact that they're holding back. His worry, his fear that he might fuck up the only relationship he's not supposed to be able to fuck up, keeps him from relaxing into her, something he knows would be far too easy.

It doesn't, though, keep him from flirting, from leaning in when he doesn't really need to, from outright bragging when the situation calls for it.

He can't do anything to slow the growth of his admiration for her. Not that he really wants to. If he'd ever really stopped to think about his perfect match, though, he is increasingly sure he'd have imagined Sara. She's gorgeous, sure, but he's been with plenty people who were good looking. It isn't just how she looks, but how she uses her body.

She fights better than he does, at least in close combat, and he's not exactly bad at it. She can flow through her movements like water, but she does it with this restrained power. She's holding back, and he's both terrified and enthralled by the idea of seeing her really let loose.

It's not just her physicality that attracts him, either. That would be easier to deal with. It's not just the almost immediate trust he's never experienced; that, he attributes to their bond. But she's funny. Not always in an obvious way, but she has this humor that sort of sneaks up on you. It works for her, and Leonard finds himself fighting genuine smiles more and more frequently.

He knows they shouldn't—can't—fight their attraction for long. They were made for each other, or at least, that's what their tattoos say, and it's not like he's had any reason to disbelieve it since they met.

Other than, of course, the fact that now that he's actually met his soulmate, he can't believe he could possibly be so lucky. Why would someone like Sara ever want to be with a crook like him?

* * *

Knowing he's her soulmate makes it easier to relax with him. It might be something to do with how the soulmate bond works, but things just feel right.

Knowing he's her soulmate also makes it harder to relax with him; things just feel right, and she knows by now that when things feel right, everything's about to change.

It's like they end up around each other without even trying. Even in a group, they end up next to each other more often than not, and then he does stuff like leaning toward her when he doesn't need to, and she does the same, and she's amazed none of the team has confronted them yet.

And this is while they're both still fighting against their bond.

The fact that Leonard's mark is never showing probably helps. He likes his layers, and some perverse part of her just wants to strip him of them, to peel away one protective layer at a time until he's bare before her in more ways than one.

To her surprise, he's already more open with her than with anyone but Mick. She can tell he's on guard, but he still shares. He lets her get a peek of what's underneath, and it makes her crave more.

Only, she's not ready.

It's fear holding her back, she thinks. Fear of rejection, whether it should be impossible or not. Fear that their relationship will be the one that doesn't work. Fear that he'll decide he wants someone who maybe wasn't _dead_ for a year, someone who doesn't struggle with a lust for blood.

It doesn't help to watch Kendra and Carter. They're not just soulmates, but soulmates on an endless loop, and it seems like they can't always even stand each other. There's a tension between them, as Kendra holds back, and as afraid Sara is of giving in, she thinks she might be more afraid of causing a rift between them that can't be mended.

So when he flirts, she flirts back. When he seeks her out, she relaxes into his companionship. He's smart, and she swears those blue eyes could probably get him any romantic partner he wanted.

It's just hard to wrap her mind around it, despite the physical evidence on their arms; why would he want someone who's as much of a mess as she is?

* * *

When their almost comfortable, almost unbearable assessment of each other is broken, it's not actually by either Leonard or Sara.

It's entirely Mick's fault.

He corners Leonard alone first.

"So, Blondie's the one, huh?" Mick sits next to Leonard, sliding a drink over to him before taking a sip of his own.

"What are you talking about, Mick?" Because playing dumb has worked so well for him in the recent past.

"You know what I'm talking about. She's the reason why there's a bird on your wrist." He nods knowingly at Leonard and takes another sip.

Len figures he has two options. He can hide it from Mick, something he's obviously been doing _such_ a good job of, or he can go ahead and admit it and maybe get another perspective on the whole matter.

"She's my soulmate," he drawls, not quite able to put as much derision in the word as he has in the past. "What the fuck am I supposed to do with that?"

Mick's quiet for a long minute. "I ever tell you about Katy?"

"No," Leonard replies carefully, not following the apparent change in subject.

Mick rolls up his sleeve and unfastens his wristwatch, showing a little, colorless key. "Hers was a flame."

Leonard is silent, watching his partner, waiting for him to continue.

Mick finishes off his drink and toys with the empty bottle. "We were kids. She got in a car wreck with her parents, was in a coma for about a week." He ran his thumb over the mark, then put his watch back on and rolled up his sleeve. "Wasn't long after that I gave in and started playing with fire." Mick caresses the final word, his eyes lighting briefly.

"Anyway," he says, shaking his head as if to clear it, "we didn't know each other long. We weren't old enough to ever do anything about it. We were soulmates. We had forever." He spins the bottle between his hands. "Forever isn't always long enough."

The silence stretches out. Leonard finishes the beer before he speaks. "I've already lost her once. What happens if I chase her away? What happens if I don't, and she dies again? What would it do to _her_ if a heist goes wrong and I'm the one who bites the bullet?"

Mick listens, and Leonard continues. "She's perfect, Mick. She's been through shit, and she hasn't let it break her."

"Think we're all a little broken."

Leonard looks at Mick, and he sees the other man stand and toss his empty bottle in the trash. Mick nods and leaves Leonard to his thoughts.

* * *

"He doesn't like that you died." Mick's voice behind her in the training room makes Sara jump.

"What?" she asks, breathless from her workout.

"He doesn't like that you died," Mick repeats, "but only 'cause he's afraid. He's not used to giving a shit."

"Yeah, I've figured that out. Thanks." Sara wipes her hair out of her face and sets down her staff, watching Mick.

"Then why haven't you done anything about it?"

"What am I supposed to do?" There's an edge to Sara's voice, but she doesn't care. "Like you said, he doesn't like that I died. I'm fucked up. I can't change that."

"He thinks he's the one who's fucked up."

Sara exhales roughly. "I don't know how to change _that_ , either."

"You see something in him, don't you, Blondie?"

"Of course I do," Sara bites out. She hesitates. "You know about us, don't you?"

"He told me," Mick answers. "He doesn't know how to handle it."

Sara's laugh is anything but amused. "Yeah? Well he can join the club." She swipes at a trickle of sweat running down her cheek.

"Do you like him?" Mick asks like it's the simplest question in the world.

"Of course I do." Sara grips her staff. "He's just… Well, you're his partner. You know." She can't quite put it into words. Len is smart. He's a criminal, yeah, but he's got this code. And the way he makes her _feel,_ like maybe she doesn't have to be worried about being a fuckup because he gets it, and he doesn't see her that way.

Maybe given enough time, it'll help. He'll be able to make her forget, and she'll be able to help him give a damn. But for now?

For now, she waits. She'll get to know, him, spend time with him and see what happens. They're soulmates, after all. Surely, if it's meant to happen, it will.

Right?

"I know what he's like," Mick agrees, interrupting her thoughts. "He's trying to hide from it, but he already cares what happens to you. Gotta say, I kinda care, too."

"You don't even know me." The retort is automatic, and Mick smiles in response.

"You matter to him, Blondie, so you matter to me. He hasn't had a lot of good in his life. Think maybe you can be someone who's good for him." He nods at Sara and leaves the room, and she's left alone like nothing's happened, but everything's changed and she doesn't even know why.


	4. Destined to Care for You

**Destined to Care for You**

Kendra's tattoo is black and white, and something in Leonard shifts as he remembers when his own had reverted to that state. Now that he actually knows Sara, the very idea of her loss makes him angry, almost desperate. They're only just getting to know each other, and already, Leonard has an inkling of why soulmates die close together so often.

Forget the self-destructive phase he went through when his unknown soulmate seemed to have vanished; if he lost Sara, even now, he'd spiral out of control. It isn't codependency, though, not really. It's just that he knows instinctively that she makes him better, and that maybe he can help her, too.

His first impulse is to avoid her until he figures out what he needs to do, but he finds himself unable to, partly because they're drawn to each other, and partly because Mick decides words aren't enough interference. He finds excuses to push them together.

Not that it takes all that much. Playing cards, giving the professor a hard time, training… It's all better with Sara.

Leonard, Mick, and Sara are playing cards together one day when Raymond walks in, rubbing his thumb across the mark on his wrist. It's neither an idle movement nor a thoughtful one; the man is rubbing it hard, as if he wishes he could remove it. Leonard can't quite see what it is, but he can tell it has color.

Raymond has a soulmate waiting for him, somewhere, and he doesn't seem happy about it.

Sara raises her eyebrows at Leonard like she's thinking the same thing, and she's much closer than Leonard realized. Her knee rests gently against his thigh, and if her hands weren't clutching her cards where he couldn't see them, he could easily reach out and lace their fingers together.

Not that he wants to, of course.

But she'd come into his space, into his invisible, protective bubble, and he hadn't even noticed.

Raymond sighs loudly, drawing his attention. "What is it, Raymond?" Leonard drawls, dragging his eyes away from Sara and latching onto the distraction, ignoring Mick's smirk.

"Nothing," Raymond huffs. Leonard starts a mental countdown: _three, two one…_ "It's just," the man continues, right on cue, "I don't know. I'm feeling a little trapped, I guess."

"Do you know who she is?" Sara asks, nodding toward Raymond's wrist when the man looks surprised.

He drops his hands to his sides and sighs. "I don't. And that's the problem, isn't it? Every time I think I've found the one, she turns out to be the wrong one. Forcing it doesn't seem to help, but I feel like not trying is just giving up, giving into some phenomenon that nobody really understands anyway. How does this"—he holds his wrist so he can glare at it—"know who my perfect woman is?"

Somehow, Leonard manages to keep from looking at Sara, but he can feel her eyes on him. Mick is probably watching him, too. He looks down at his cards before speaking again. "Did something specific bring on your existential angst?"

"Yes. No. I don't know." Raymond runs a hand through his annoyingly perfect hair.

"Enlightening," Leonard drawls, and he hears Mick chuckle.

"Yeah, well, I don't know. It's Kendra and Carter, I think. If there were ever two legitimate soulmates, it's them, and even they couldn't get it right. What chance do the rest of us have?"

Leonard mulls the sentiment over silently, excruciatingly aware of Sara's knee pressing against him. Before he can decide on a response, Raymond continues. "Sorry for bringing down the party," he says, seeming to finally notice the card game. "I'll just… I'm gonna go find something to eat."

* * *

Kendra's tattoo is black and white, and Kendra had still been fighting against her destiny, and Sara doesn't want to imagine what that must feel like. She's only just getting to know Leonard, and still, she knows that losing him would wreck her.

Fighting against their bond gets harder all the time. There are touches now, occasionally. Only Mick seems to have noticed. The man gets some sort of perverse satisfaction at seeing them together. He's grown on her, though. Not to the same extent as Leonard has, but she'll still upset when Mick gets taken along with Ray and the professor.

She's not as upset as Leonard is, though.

The things he says to her about Rip's side-mission, about possibly killing Stein, are hard to ignore. He talks like he knows her better than she knows herself, and that's just bullshit. How can he say it's the wrong thing to do, when she's only considering it to save the world?

His use of their labels bothers her. Sure, he's been a crook and she's been an assassin. She left that life behind, though, and he's needling her about doing what she has to do now.

It's not like he's still the crook anymore. Not in the same way he was. When he steals, it's usually for a cause.

Isn't that the same as what she's doing? What she's ready to do, anyway, to save most of the team and the whole damned planet?

And yet Leonard doesn't just let it go, doesn't let her do what she needs to. Her fucking soulmate is an asshole.

What about Stein's soulmate, though? Sara knows she's still alive in 2016. If she pulls this trigger, will Clarissa's mark go dark? She isn't sure how that works with time travel, but it makes her think about Kendra's tattoo. It makes her think about how she'd feel if she lost Leonard.

It's enough to make her slow her actions, and it gives Leonard a chance to reiterate his opinion. This time, though, instead of needling her, instead of plying her with guilt or with what he'd do differently, there's genuine feeling in his voice.

"That's how a killer thinks, and that's not you anymore." He's almost pleading, and it's enough.

Stein is safe for now, and the rest of the world is doomed.

Except they make it work, somehow. Their cobbled-together team of misfit, wannabe legends manages to pull the damned thing off, and then Rip is praising her for not doing what he asked, and Sara can't help but give credit where it's due.

If they hadn't been attacked, she's sure Rip would've figured out right then that she and Leonard have something between them.

* * *

He doesn't want to admit how much Sara plays into his decision to get back on the Waverider rather than staying in the alternate version of 2046. Partly, he doesn't want to admit to himself or to Mick that he might've chosen Sara over his partner.

When Mick wakes up, though, he calls him on it.

"You screwed me over so you could be with Blondie, when you're not even planning to make a move."

"And what _should_ I have done, Mick? I couldn't stay, and you knew that."

"Then why not just leave me behind?"

"I couldn't do that, either." Leonard paces the room, and Mick watches him, his body still coiled tight with anger.

"And why not? I could've been happy there." Something in Mick's tone reminds Leonard of when he'd talked about Katy. "That world was _made_ for me."

"But then where would I have been, huh?" Leonard doesn't mean to shout, and he stills, trying to reign in his errant emotions. "You've been there for me, Mick, since I was just a scrawny little kid. Even when we weren't working together, I knew I could call and you'd be there. I know it was selfish, but you and Lisa are all I've got. I couldn't leave you in an alternate timeline and never see you again."

"You've got Blondie," Mick says, quietly.

"I know," Leonard answers, sitting on the bed across from his partner and hanging his head. "Still doesn't mean I want to lose you, it seems."

They don't talk anymore for a while, but Leonard figures he's mostly been forgiven when Mick locks him and Sara in a closet for three hours.

* * *

They've been in this closet for almost three hours. Leonard says it's his fault, his and Mick's, but he won't explain how or why.

They end up talking about their childhoods. To say they were different would be the understatement of the century.

Still, though, they're here together now. At least the closest has a decent amount of room, and it has a light, so they aren't trapped in the dark.

She's been able to watch Leonard's face as he talks about his father, as he talks about his sister. She sees the teasing light in his eyes when he calls Sara a daddy's girl. She sees the way he watches her, intent, those blue eyes looking right into her, soaking up all the information they can find.

She sees the way he looks away when it's a little too much, his eyes darting down to her wrist before moving to the safety of the floor.

When the door finally opens, she sees Mick standing outside, his arms crossed.

"You two get through your shit yet?" he asks.

"We're working on it, Mick," Leonard answers. "We just need some time."

Sara has to wonder, though. Is it really that they need time? They were just in a closet for three hours, and neither of them had tried to kill the other. She can't think of anyone else she could stand being locked up with for that long, at least not without resorting to sex, and yet she isn't even in a hurry to leave.

Maybe Mick has the right idea, after all. Maybe just sticking together is the way to go.

It doesn't make it any less terrifying how fast she's falling.


	5. Destined to Need You

Ugh, I'm so sorry, I didn't realize ffnet had eaten my scene separators. It's fixed now, and as an apology, two chapters this week, one today and one tomorrow as usual. Story goes canon divergent here.

* * *

 **Destined to Need You**

It's when they nearly freeze to death that she's able to admit that Leonard has really, truly gotten under her skin. She thinks she might've been drawn to him even without the whole soulmate thing, might've still found herself here, now.

He asks her what it's like to die. She answers as honestly as she can, though she can't quite resist a little jab at him. She pretends he's not her first choice for company in a situation like this.

Sure, it'd be nice to see her family again before she dies, but she's not putting them through this again, and she thinks she and Leonard together have a better chance than either of them would alone or with others. It's that feeling of rightness that she can't shake.

Not that she wants to shake it anymore. It's become a part of her, as much as her past, as much as her death, as much as anything else she calls hers. Sara Lance's soulmate is Leonard Snart, and as much as she hated it at first, she'll admit it now, at least to herself: she needs him, and she's glad he's here with her in this otherwise shitty moment.

* * *

It's when they nearly freeze to death that he's able to admit that Sara's gotten under his skin, that she might've found her way there even if they weren't soulmates.

He opens up about things he doesn't expect to. His childhood and his father are one thing; they're both behind him. This is maybe the equivalent of a death-bed confession, though, trapped with Sara in a situation much less hospitable than a well-lit closet.

Plus, it's Sara. It's his soulmate, and hell if he's going to hide from her if this might be the last time they get to spend with anyone.

She's aware of the lingering the tension between him and Mick—it was obvious since Mick is clearly still putting time into getting them together, despite his annoyance—so it makes sense that he'd come up in conversation, even if the topic seems unrelated. Leonard tells her about when they met. It's an important moment for him, not one he's really shared before.

As fucked up as he is, he knows that not everyone is _only_ out for themselves, and that's mostly been thanks to Mick. So telling her about it, about the incident that sealed their partnership, friendship, whatever it was…

It's showing her a part of him. It's showing her a part of himself he doesn't hate, doesn't try to ignore, doesn't fight. It's not exactly a sweet story, but then, Leonard isn't exactly a sweet guy.

* * *

They check the doors again, fruitlessly, then sit back down, closer this time, trying to conserve heat and energy.

They talk until it's too hard. They talk until she can't feel her hands, until everything she _can_ feel is pain, until she can't stop shaking and doesn't think she'll ever be warm again. And through it all, Leonard is there.

Of course he is; he's stuck there as much as she is. Still, his presence makes it easier, as does the conversation. It's easier to pretend they aren't stuck here. It's easier to pretend everything is normal. It's easier to pretend they aren't about to die.

It's easier to remember that they're not alone.

So when she can't take the cold anymore, when she needs to do _something_ but knows that anything active will just make things worse, it's not a stretch at all to lean into him, to wrap her hands around his arm and pull herself close.

* * *

Despite everything, or maybe because of everything, he has to look away when she grabs his arm and pulls him close.

He considers telling her that he's ready to give them a shot, ready to see whether this soulmate stuff carries over into other aspects of a relationship, but he's just so damned cold.

It hurts everywhere, and he doesn't want to associate their beginning with this much pain. Even Sara's touch almost sharpens it, and now they're both shivering too much to talk, so that's how they stay until the bulkhead opens.

Gideon is able to warm them up enough that they aren't in active danger, and Sara puts an arm on his as he heads toward the bridge to see what's going on with his partner.

"What is it?" He turns toward her, and her blue eyes are fixed on his. He fights impatience; something is wrong with Mick, he knows it. She doesn't keep him long, though, just watches him for a couple seconds, her arm still on his, as she says what she needs to.

"Thanks."

"Back at you, Sara."

And then they find the others, and then Mick is with the pirates, and Leonard feels like he's being torn in half, Mick on one side and Sara on the other. Leonard says he needs to choose a side, and Mick's eyes bore into his before he gives the slightest nod, the one that's always said they're on the same page.

The one that says when Leonard starts shooting the pirates, he won't be choosing between his partner and his soulmate. Something loosens in his chest, and he smirks a little, despite himself, before he fires. Mick turns and immediately fires on the intruders, too, before the team has time to decide he's a target.

* * *

Leonard Snart in Western getup is nearly sinful. And she can feel him watching her, wearing something between a smirk and a smile.

She's gotten used to him watching her. Things have felt different since they nearly froze to death.

There's a moment in a diner when it's almost like they're on a double date with Kendra and Ray, who are posing as a married couple. Then Kendra and Ray get left behind, and though the team is able to dispatch the person sent to kill them, there's some sort of malfunction with the Waverider, and they end up coming back late, and not by a few minutes, either.

Then there's time with Mick. Things are still tense at first, and Sara's able to pry a bit of information out of him. As much as she doesn't usually hate Rip, she really wants to punch him after hearing what he told Mick when the whole thing with the pirates went down. Sara's glad Leonard isn't there to hear about it.

The two friends get their heads out of their asses eventually, though. It's better after that, and Mick is with Sara and Leonard as often as they're alone.

The team as a whole has a rough patch when there's the debate about killing a kid to save the world. It seems like a common theme with Rip, she thinks, killing one to save so many, but it's not a call she'd ever be able to make on her own, and she wouldn't want to have to, either.

They hide out in the temporal zone for a while after that. Sara gets more downtime with everyone, but especially with Leonard, and it gets progressively harder to ignore certain things.

Not the soulmate bond anymore. She's not even pretending to fight that. They haven't really talked about an actual relationship, but they've fallen into one anyway, and she's not sure exactly when it happened. One thing, though, is definitely still missing, and Sara craves the physical intimacy more every day.

It doesn't help how often he turns those eyes on her. It doesn't help when she catches him staring at her after a hard training session. It doesn't help when she sees him in a sleeveless sleep shirt and she's faced with muscles and scars, both of which make her want to touch, if in very different ways.

The casual touches have increased, if only a little. He doesn't flinch when she puts her hand on his arm to get his attention. She tries not to take his hand when his fingers brush hers as he passes her a drink, the touch lingering much too long and often accompanied by eye contract and a wry smile.

And while they're in the temporal zone, she manages to keep her urges under control. Being around him, around Mick, having a purpose on the team, it's helped to settle her blood lust, and she's mostly able to channel that control into avoiding full-on fantasy.

But Leonard Snart dressed up like a damned Old West outlaw, minus the bandana over the lower half of his face, tips her over the edge.

He's watching her, and it's like he can tell exactly how much she wants to jump him in this moment, and yet they haven't even kissed.

It's getting harder and harder to figure out why.


	6. Destined to Love You

**Destined to Love You**

Seeing Sara as a perky teenager somehow makes him feel both closer to and farther from the adult Sara.

The two versions of Sara are different, obviously. His Sara—or rather, the older Sara—is so much more physically capable.

Not that the younger Sara has any trouble slapping the younger Mick. But _his_ Sara shows her control in every movement. She's seen more, has experienced more, has become the person he knows, the person he…

And though both versions of Sara are gorgeous, he can't say he has any desire to get _physical_ with her younger counterpart.

Seeing Sara in that cowboy outfit and not touching her was torture. He needs to get past his issues and make a move—or let her make a move, he really doesn't care—so they can both relieve tension in more creative ways than they have been. Card games and sharing drinks are great and all, but they can do better.

Teenaged Sara doesn't seem to realize her soulmate is on board. Leonard thinks maybe it's because that unmistakable first meeting happens in her future, which means even though she hasn't met him yet, they've already met for the first time.

Because that's not a mind fuck.

Still, he's pretty sure they shouldn't mess up the timelines any more than they already have, and he makes sure his mark, with its matching color and the bird she might not even know represents her, stays hidden.

His Sara notices, though he's not sure how; it isn't like he shows the mark all that often anyway. When they find a quiet moment by themselves, without any younger versions of anybody nearby, she takes his wrist, much like she had right after they'd met.

This time, though, her touch is somehow both gentler and more confident. They're in her room, but the door's open, and anyone could walk by. It all fades, though, at the look in her eyes, at the warmth that seeps through his sleeve.

She doesn't say anything at first. After a long minute, she breaks eye contact. He watches as she pushes his sleeve up and out of the way, stopping when she reaches the little tattoo. She runs her fingertips over it, and Leonard's breath catches. She curls her hand around his arm, her thumb positioned over the canary, and she strokes back and forth across the sensitive skin.

He doesn't know when she looks back up at him because his eyes close without his permission. When he opens them, she's watching him with a little smile.

"The whole us-as-kids thing is weird, huh?" Sara asks, her voice even. Her smile widens and her eyes spark with mischief. "You were a cute baby."

He smirks back at her, finding some of his equilibrium in the light teasing he's gotten used to. "It's weird alright. I'll admit, I got some satisfaction from younger Sara slapping Mick. He may be my partner now, but he was a bit of a shit back then."

"And he's a perfect gentleman now."

Leonard doesn't object to her sarcasm. He knows she likes Mick and doesn't mean anything by it. Besides, she's right in her implications; Mick would rarely pass as a proper gentleman.

Sara's thumb stops over his tattoo, and she shuffles closer to him. She's looking up at an angle that can't be comfortable, and he can't get his heart to slow enough to catch his breath. He's not a virgin, but he feels like he's reacting like one, every cell of his body focused on the woman before him, as if his life is going to change in the best way if she'll just press her lips to his.

But she doesn't. Another shuffling step forward, and she releases his wrist to wrap her arms around his waist. He stills for a moment, then reciprocates, wrapping his arms around her shoulders.

She's so small, and it's hard to believe she holds so much power, even when he can feel the muscles under his touch. She fits perfectly under his chin, and relaxing into the embrace is as easy as breathing, which he's finally remembered how to do.

"What's this for?" he asks when she makes no move to pull away.

"It's been weird, and not the kind of weird I usually look for. And I just… This is nice."

He doesn't respond, but he tilts his head to the side, resting his cheek on her hair. They're still like that when Mick finds them. They don't jump apart. For one thing, it's Mick, and he already knows almost as much as they do about their relationship. For another, he just doesn't give a shit who sees them, and the way Sara brushes her hand over his tattoo one more time before sliding his sleeve back down his arm?

It tells him she feels the same.

* * *

She doesn't like seeing him with Cassandra Savage. She gets it, sure.

He can relate to her. They understand the whole shitty-father thing, and while Sara's dad might not have always been perfect, he was a great dad, and he was worlds better than they had.

Still, she doesn't like it. He spends so much time dismissing most people, and she's used to his relationship with Mick. For this stranger to come in, to see him drawn to her for any reason, is hard, even if she reminds herself it's silly.

The mild jealousy, at least, is easy enough to separate from the rest of the feelings she has regarding Leonard. Those have continued to grow. She's not sure how much more she can take before her feelings bubble over and spill out in some uncontrolled way.

She hadn't cared for him hiding his tattoo, either, but with their younger selves around, it made some sense.

Okay, it made plenty of sense. Still, their marks are a promise that they're meant for each other, and the idea of either of them actively hiding theirs doesn't sit well with her. "Together" with Leonard doesn't scare her anymore, not really. It's like their whole relationship feels like that hug she snagged when she had a chance; it's comforting and electrifying at once, and she doesn't want to ever lose this feeling.

Cassandra's mark stays hidden under tight sleeves, and Sara finds herself wondering about Cassie's other half. Where are they? Has she found them? Lost them? Could you follow someone so blindly when it might lead to the death of your soulmate?

While she's on that line of thought, she wonders about Savage himself. His soulmate must have been from when he was still mortal. There's no other way to explain his ever-lasting fixation on Kendra. Then again, having an infinite number of lifetimes in which to search for your soulmate? That prospect would drive anyone crazy.

Hell, Sara herself hadn't even made it two decades before acting out.

Okay, so maybe she understands a little of why he's intrigued by Cassandra, especially with the shared daddy issues. It's gotta be rough on Leonard, though; how would it feel to know the person actively trying to destroy an entire planet is _still_ a better father than yours?

And then there's the whole mess with Kendra. She got engaged to Ray, but Carter's back, but he isn't Carter…

It reinforces again that fighting against being with your soulmate just doesn't go well. Since she no longer wants to fight, anyway, it makes her feel… Unsettled. She feels like she left the stove on or something, like there's something she needs to do and harm will come only if she doesn't do it.

Maybe she does still worry about taking that last step. It's so huge. Sometimes, the shift from friends to lovers makes no difference, but with Leonard? With her soulmate? With someone she's already fully in lo—

"Penny for your thoughts, Blondie?" Mick interrupts her musing rather effectively.

"Just a penny, Mick? Didn't peg you as being so cheap." She turns to him, crossing her arms and smirking.

"Never been able to sneak up on you before. Surely the first time gets me a discount."

Sara's lips twitch. The big man might play dumb sometimes, and sure, he's lacking some basic information, but that doesn't make him stupid. "I was just thinking about the whole soulmate thing. Time travel complicates it some."

"You and Snart are both on the same time ship." Mick says it like it's a given, and she guesses it is.

"I know. But like Kendra and Carter. Savage. And what happens if something happens to Stien? If it's in the future, when would his wife's mark go dark?" She sighs. "I don't know. It's supposed to all be so simple, but it's not always."

They talk until they have to rejoin the team, and then everything is too busy to talk for a while.

And then Cassandra's gone, and she and Leonard are able to relax a little despite everything with Savage, despite Jax having left and Stein being in danger.

Leonard is on edge, and it doesn't take long for Sara to ask him why.

"Something's wrong. I can feel it." He looks up from his cards. "Shit's about to go sideways."

Sara shrugs one shoulder. "Hasn't stuff gone wrong since we got on this ship? What's new?"

"This is worse." He looks back at his cards. "I don't know what might happen, though. I just know it'll be bad."

Sara watches him. He's tense in a way she hasn't seen since the beginning, and she accepts his worry as potentially legitimate, but until they know more, it's not like there's anything they can do but stay together.

She tosses down another card and contemplates moving closer.


	7. Destined to Lose You

**Destined to Lose You**

They're trapped in a small space this time, but at least Leonard's chosen it. Sort of.

It keeps them both safe, anyway. But that feeling something's going wrong hasn't gone away, and he just needs to get away from here, to get them both safe, to find a place where things can't get any worse.

Of course, idiot that he is, he makes things worse himself.

He doesn't have a great reason he pulls his gun on Sara. He's scared, for himself, for her, for Mick, even for the rest of the morons who make up the team. He can't think straight beyond his sense of self-preservation, but he knows he'd never shoot her, and he knows that Sara knows it, too, and maybe this pointless gesture of violence will get her moving, will get them out of here and somewhere safe where they can reevaluate in relative peace.

It's the wrong move, and he knows it, and when she calls him on it, he has a sinking feeling in his gut. It tells him he's fucked stuff up, just like he always knew he would. The self-loathing is tempered some by the fact that she doesn't believe for a second that he'll shoot her. Even while he's being the biggest ass of his life, she believes that there's good in him.

She even goes as far as turning her back to him while he's still got the weapon pointed at her, and all the fight leaves him at that.

* * *

He pulled his fucking gun on her.

She knew he wouldn't use it, never doubted that for a second, but it still stings that he did it. She isn't some delicate flower by any means, and sparring with him more often than they had been sounded great, but he'd pulled a gun on her.

It wasn't a joke, it wasn't part of training. He'd done it because…

Why had he done it? He'd been worried, on edge, she knew. But to that extent?

Maybe it was some misogynistic need to protect his mate, doing anything he had to in order to get her somewhere safe, but she didn't exactly care for that idea, either. Besides, she hadn't seen him treating people differently because of their gender, not unless he was playing into stereotypes to maintain a disguise.

Regardless of the reason, she's pissed and a little hurt. He's her soulmate, and she thinks she should be able to trust him, and then he goes and does this.

But maybe that's the problem. She _does_ still trust him, despite this. She can't tell whether it's the soulmate bond or just because she knows him, knows that it wasn't really the threat it appeared and that she was never in danger. Not knowing which it is pisses her off more.

He goes along with her plan, though. His arguments are halfhearted at best. He makes no further move to take control of the ship or the mission, and she figures that's both an apology and a display of a hell of a lot of trust.

By the time they've rescued the team, which actually goes pretty much as planned for once, she's cooled off a little. She'd say she's annoyed, but she's no longer actively angry. Instead, she wants time alone with him or time alone with herself, wants some time to think away from the team, but she's stuck listening as much of what she knew about life and rules is turned upside down.

* * *

He can't lose her. Soulmates are supposed to be a guarantee, but if these bastards manipulate time according to their whims, who's to say they can't take her away from him?

Meanwhile Sara's still mad at him, he thinks. She's standing across the room, despite the fact that they seem to be on the same page. And though she does manage a genuine smile at him before they part ways, she still holes up alone at the first chance.

He gives her some time. He did fuck up, and if she needs some time alone to think, he'll give her that.

He doesn't give her too long, though. He's tired of waiting in this in between they have. This whole day has made him desperately aware of how easy it would be to lose her. He doesn't want to let that happen, not ever, but especially not before they've moved beyond the occasional hug.

He's ready. He… He _loves_ her, has for some time, even if that's still hard to admit even to himself. There's no other word that fits, though, nothing else that encompasses what he feels for his spirited soulmate.

So he's done waiting. Maybe the timing could be better, what with having just pointed his gun at her and all, but he needs her to know he's ready. He's all in. And when she's ready, too, maybe they can do something about it.

He finds her, cards in hand as a distraction, and apologizes, in his way, for what happened earlier, simultaneously venting his frustration at the Time Masters' manipulation.

They talk for a minute, and then he sees and opening and takes it.

* * *

"I started to wonder what the future might hold for me. And you. And me and you."

She looks at him before responding, thinking her answer through. It's not like the idea of a future is anything new for them; they're soulmates, after all. But they've spent so much time avoiding the subject that she knows when he brings it up, he isn't just talking idly.

He wants to be together, properly together, and he picks _now_ to tell her this. Now, after he was a stupid jerk earlier.

Despite her residual anger, she can't shoot him down, not really. But she isn't ready, not today. Tomorrow? Sure, they can talk about it tomorrow. Today, she's allowed to be pissed.

"You want to steal a kiss from me, Leonard?" It's a challenge. She's putting into words exactly what their next step should be. Further, she knows he can't resist a good heist, and he's the best thief she knows, on multiple levels. "You better be one hell of a thief."

She sees his smirk as she spins away and leaves the room before she can change her mind. They have forever together. She can deal with this tomorrow.

* * *

There's not really much of a choice involved, when it comes down to it. He's not about to let his partner die. He's not about to let Sara take his place. The others have left, and if he's honest, he's not sure he'd let any of them take over this suicide mission, either.

Somewhere along the road, they all started to matter to him in some way or another. Besides, he kinda likes being the one to give a giant "fuck you" to the people who've been manipulating them all this time.

He doesn't like that he'll be leaving Sara behind. He remembers how bad it was losing her before they'd even met. He knows it'll be infinitely worse now. But Sara's strong, one of the strongest people he knows. She'll make it. She has to.

They don't really have time for goodbyes. He can see the pain she feels at the idea of letting him do this, and he's afraid she's going to argue. He's not sure he has the strength to do this if she tries to talk him out of it. She responds to his gruff commands with denial, and then a look, before she surges forward, wrapping her hand around his arm and pressing her lips to his.

For a fraction of a second, he wishes she hadn't. This shouldn't be their first kiss. It's an ending and a beginning, and it kind of feels like when they first met and his world turned upside down and rightside up all at once.

But it's Sara. It's Sara, and her lips are finally against his, and he leans into the kiss as best he can given the circumstances. His eyes are closed, focusing on the feel of her, on the soft strength she has even at that point of contact, on the way her lips fit between his and give him just the slightest, tantalizing taste of her.

The kiss lasts forever, and it's much too short, and then she's pulling away and getting Mick to safety and before he knows it, his world explodes and then goes dark.

* * *

She and Mick both find their way to the bar. Sara feels like she's walking through a haze; her eyes are open, but she can't quite see.

She sits across from Mick, and she rests her head in her hands, not even aware of the oppressive silence until she gasps.

She'd felt it when they'd first met, so surely she should've felt it when he died. _He's still alive,_ she thinks, straightening, shrugging out of her jacket and letting it fall to the floor. _He's still_ —

Her tattoo is black and white. The pretty little snowflake has been drained of color, black replacing blue, and her world has been pulled apart, with no hope of putting it back together again.

"Sara…" Mick's using her name instead of calling her Blondie. If she's had any doubt, she knows now that everything is wrong. She can hear the pain in his voice, knows he's lost his partner and has to be hurting, too, but she can't bring herself to ask if he's okay.

Neither of them is okay.

"Soulmates are never supposed to be separated," she says, swiping tears off her cheek. "That's the deal. You find your other half, and that's it. You have a partner for life.

"So why am I alone now? Tell me, Mick. _Tell me!_ " The tears are streaming down her face now, and she's given up trying to wipe them away. She watches Mick, waiting for an answer.

He can't tell her though, obviously, but he does tell her about Katy, and he moves to her side of the bar and puts an arm around her when she can't stop crying, for her black and white tattoo, for Leonard's, for Mick's.

"I'm sorry, Mick," she sobs, and he pats her shoulder awkwardly but doesn't pull away. "I'm sorry."


	8. Destined to be Legends

**Destined to be Legends**

She isn't quite sure why she can't shake the guilt. Maybe it's because she'd brushed him off when he tried to open up to her, or maybe it's because it feels like there should be something they can do. They're on a _time ship._

But there's nothing. There's nothing but her guilt and her anger and her frustration and her colorless snowflake and she just wants everything to stop hurting.

At least when there's pain, though, she feels something other than alone.

Apparently, the rest of the team hadn't figured out Leonard was her soulmate. It's not like they'd really been subtle about it, despite the lack of physical affection, public or otherwise. And a snowflake? Who else would that be? But when they notice her mark has gone black and white, there is inevitably shock followed by pity.

Except from Rip. From Rip, she gets empathy without surprise.

"I am truly sorry, Sara," he says when she joins him to avoid the looks from the others. Mick is notably absent from the group. "If there were anything I could do, you know I would in a heartbeat." He puts his hand atop his covered tattoo. "Not only to spare anyone else the pain of losing their other half, but also because he truly was a hero, despite his past."

"Did you know?" she asks.

"That the two of you were soulmates? Not at first, no. Not when I chose you." He runs a hand through his hair. "I wouldn't have taken you both, honestly. Shipboard romances can be a distraction. I know that's hypocritical of me, but it's true. I didn't foresee things between Raymond and Kendra, either, but I didn't stop them.

"I did figure out Mr. Snart was your soulmate before much time had passed. The snowflake was pretty obvious, and you two were always very aware of each other. Honestly, I should've dropped the lot of you off sooner, but I am loathe to cause you more pain."

"I'm not ready to leave," Sara says. "Leonard died a hero. We can't give up until we've found a way to defeat Savage once and for all."

* * *

He isn't quite sure why he can't wake up. He's floating, but he doesn't know what he's floating in. He can't open his eyes, but he gets impressions. It feels like…

Strings. Like some sort of bizarre hammock, only the strings are made out of something he can feel but can't touch. When he presses on one, or on the impression of one, he sees…

Images. Flashes of pictures that he knows, somehow, are both past and future. He sees Mick, drinking alone on the Waverider, and then with Raymond. He sees Lisa, sees his younger self step between her and their father. He sees Sara in pain. He sees—

Impossibility. As he focuses on one, the image lingers. He and Sara are on his bed. They're in the clothes they wear for training, and there's a thin layer of sweat on each of them. That's not what has him riveted to the scene, though; they've crashed on his bed while they catch their breath before.

This time, though, she's sprawled out on top of him. Their hips press together. One of his hands holds her close while the other tangles in her hair. They kiss like nothing else in the world matters, like it's only the two of them, and it's clear this isn't stopping at just a kiss.

He's dead, or at least he should be even if it doesn't feel like he is, so how is he seeing this? He thought the contraption he'd died in was only supposed to show certainties. This hadn't ever happened, though, so this has to be the future.

Either this time thing is busted along with the machine he'd destroyed, or he isn't as dead as he thought.

He fumbles back through until he finds the one of Sara, alone in her room on the Waverider. He knows, somehow, that the pain is caused by his leaving, and not by anything else. He doesn't know how much information the strings are feeding him and how much he knows just because he knows Sara.

He tries to think. If he isn't dead, there has to be some way out of here, and this is where he wants to go. He needs to stop her pain, needs to return to the living, needs to give Mick a hard time about trying to save the world when he's supposed to be the more unscrupulous of the two of them.

He can't grab hold of the string, not in the physical sense. In the same way he's been pressing on them, he sort of wraps his fingers around the intangible space and closes them, focusing hard on the image of Sara.

Everything goes black again, and then the world bursts into color.

* * *

Sara's alone in her room, watching her tattoo. It's not the first time. They defeated Savage and got back on the ship, and Rip seems torn on whether to bring them home yet.

She isn't sure what she wants, so she's here, tracing the tiny lines she knows by heart. She frowns, imagining a flash of color, but when she lifts her finger, it's still black.

Or is it?

She stares. It's like those pictures where looking at it in a certain way shows an image; if she relaxes her eyes, the snowflake is in color. When she focuses again, it's not.

Before she can decide whether her mind is playing tricks on her, it's like the room shifts, and her tattoo is fully back in color, but she isn't looking at it anymore because standing next to her bed is Leonard.

She doesn't question it. She knows it's him, knows he's here, alive, and she leaps up with a gasp and wraps her arms around him before he can even speak.

"You were gone," she says when she can find the words. "You were dead. My snowflake was black and white, and you were gone."

"It's not a good feeling, is it?" Leonard pulls back and glances his wrist, and she's again reminded that his mark had gone dark for a year, and suddenly she's too far away from him. She pulls him closer, lifting her head this time so she can kiss him in a way that isn't just a hello, isn't a goodbye, but is a joining of two souls who were always destined to meet.

* * *

Mick finds them before they can take it any further than a kiss, and Leonard is wrapped into a hug for the second time in several minutes, this one a little more awkward but the person giving it no less appreciated.

He's dragged around the time ship, getting the reunions out of the way quickly, at least. Kendra and Carter apparently want some time on their own, off the Waverider, so they'll be landing in a while, but they have some time.

There's a look from Rip, relief mixed with sorrow, and Leonard isn't sure how to handle it. Instead, thoughts of the images he'd seen in that in between place on his mind, he asks Sara whether she wants to try sparring, and she grins before they go change, and he's not shocked at all when she comes out wearing the same thing he'd seen in that vision.

He was right, too; they don't stop at kissing.


End file.
